OK, we're on the heels of the inauguration of our first African American president. In my last entry, it was the day before. Today, is several months afterwards. Needless to say, I'm very happy and hopeful about this presidency and 2009 for that matter. What I want to talk about today is female leadership, particularly female leadership in politics. I can only discuss and attempt to analyze what I am most familiar with so, for all intents and purpose (something that my professor at Temple often prefaced with his lectures), these are empirical observations.
It seems to me that there is a distinct difference between being tough and being a bitch. Sorry for those women activists who think this is a slight. Anyway, often I see women (and men) try to be tough, but instead come of as being a bitch. That is, leadership marked by a narcissism and fear that engenders a pettiness and passive aggressive (punk-bitch) retributive style of correction i.e. punishment. That is, if you do something to me (anything at all, nothing that threatens one's power in a real sense, but something that one perceives to threaten one's power), I will do something back to hurt you. By no means do I believe that one should sit idly by if one is being attacked. But the nature of one's response is a key factor in determining one's leadership style.
I think women often often try to be tough, but actually come of being a bit bitchy. Men do this too. Being tough means providing a response to a threat or attack without taking a "dig" --that extra step that says don't f**** with me, if you do, I will with you. I think the tough approach is more so if you f**** with me, I will protect myself and will create an offensive strategy for you and you action, if deemed necessary, will be corrected. The punk-bitch and bitch style are always defensive. Passive aggressive responses to attacks and subtle responses are different. It is fine to let folks know your power, but you don't necessary have to usurp another's power at the first sign of aggressive or to retain your own. Some folks recognize subtleties. Passive aggression sends the wrong message and just pisses people off. Punishment scares folks and pisses them off. Those that are scared are not empowered and those that are pissed off---well that's a whole nother animal i.e. the Middle East before and after the US invasion of Iraq. Correction is the best policy. One's response to an attack---if you must respond and you always should either directly to or building an offensive--must be corrective. So, being tough means being corrective and standing your ground when it comes to your ideas when it comes to attacks. It doesn't mean punishment or, at least, I don't think it should.
Monday, January 5, 2009
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